Six rounds of ketamine, and I feel better

Hello my loves 😍 

Well, we’ve made it to July — more than halfway through this wretched year, and I’m putting my hopes out into the world for a better second half. Despite the horrors, like this week’s passage of the Republican policy bill that will decimate public goods like Medicaid and give unfathomable money and resources to public ills like ICE, I am holding out hope for better days. For Republican lawmakers to gain a spine and start saying “no” to their despot. For Democratic lawmakers to also gain a spine and start acting like a true opposition party and start, you know, opposing things.

And in the absence of either of those things from our elected officials, my hope lies in community — in us uplifting and protecting ourselves. Power to the people, etc…

From the heart 💗

About six ketamine treatments

I —

I have sat here with my cursor blinking after the word “I” for like five minutes now. Partly this is because I’m listening to a fascinating podcast while I write — but mainly because, how do I capture in words the magnitude of change I’ve experienced over the past three weeks?

Words are my thing, words are the tools of my trade and the toys I play with 24/7 and the method by which I share my heart and experiences with the world. And words are not sufficient, in this moment, to communicate everything that’s on my heart and in my mind.

On June 16, 2025, I made my way to Midtown Manhattan for the first of six initial ketamine infusions. I did not know what to expect, other than a nebulous understanding that I’d have a “trip,” that the ketamine was medicine that would help rewrite neural pathways in my brain, and that the results could either astound or disappoint me.

For 50 minutes I sat in a reclining chair in a windowless room, music on, and just…thought thoughts. I closed my eyes and pictured myself on a deserted beach on a tropical island — apparently, based on how often this image showed up, that’s my happy place — and thought to myself that I have control issues. Over the next five sessions, I realized that I need to bet on myself; I felt pride for being a survivor; I circled back, again and again, to the idea of relinquishing.

In the meantime, the ketamine made its way not just through my veins but to my brain. And within two weeks, I was looking around wondering — has the world always been this clear??? It’s the moment as a kid when I put on glasses for the first time and saw the world in sharp relief and realized things weren’t fuzzy and foggy naturally.

I didn’t even know I was experiencing brain fog! It was just my reality, so ever-present that I hardly dared to dream there was another way to live.

Listen — there will be days going forward when I’m felled by depression. But I feel so much hope for the future, hope that things are going to get and stay better. Hope that I’ll be better able to cope with hard things, which will make me better able to enjoy good things. Just…hope.

It’s radical.

From the question box ❓

What questions do you have for me — about publishing, writing, grad school, ketamine, anything?

From the shelf 📚

A Caribbean Heiress in Paris, by Adriana Herrera

God, I love a historical romance. I especially love a historical romance that shows a diverse world — as it would have been — and doesn’t froth over things like colonization or the horrors of empire. I especially especially love a historical romance that is hot and steamy and where I just want to shove the hero and heroine into a room and scream TALK TO EACH OTHER YOU BOTH ARE IN LOVE OH MY GODDDDD JUST TAAAAAAALK.

I got so much of that delicious goodness in Adriana Herrera’s A Caribbean Heiress in Paris, the first in a historical romance trilogy following three Caribbean women and beginning in Paris, 1889, at the Expedition Universaile. In this book we follow Luz Alana, a rum heiress trying to expand her business, and a Scottish earl named Evan who is immediately the whippedest of men for her. Like, she meets him and snaps at him and he’s just like “oh that’s hot.” God, I love a man who’s a little pathetic for a beautiful woman. [Who among us isn’t!!!]

The book is fast-paced and high stakes and in addition to Luz Alana and Evan I adored the side characters. I cannot wait to continue this series!

I think you NEED to buy this book, so here’s a handy dandy affiliate link to Bookshop.org — if you purchase through the link I’ll get a cute lil commission at no extra cost to you 😉 

And if you read it and like it and want more Adriana Herrera books, check out and follow the Kickstarter launch page for After the End, a dystopian romance collection featuring Adriana and seven other authors. The covers were released this week and I’m a lil feral for this project to launch!

Alla prossima 👋

That brings us to the end today, but rest easy — this is not the last piece of content you’ll get from me! Today at 3:30 pm ET the first of my new interview series drops! Subscribe to my YouTube and follow me on Instagram to get updates as the interviews go live each week!

This past Monday, my podcast The Write Way of Life published it’s 11th (!!!) episode, this one something of a screed against AI. I want you to listen to it! 😄 

And never forget, you can always purchase a copy of Juvenilia, my self-published collection of high school poetry, if you wish to support me and/or read some dramatic poems!

I will see y’all next week.

— Karis xoxo